Today I got schooled.
It was by 2 precious women in my life who are friends and colleagues. We help each other in this crazy business of ours by keeping each other on the hook for our entrepreneurial duties. For instance, I had to do all kinds of fun things in Word Press to post this. I would rather have a tooth pulled. With no novocaine. We hold each other’s feet to the fire about showing up and being as true to ourselves and our purpose as we can. It is the kind of relationship that is so important to have when you are in business for yourself like the three of us.
The truth is, I am not showing up.
I am here, but I am not putting myself out there enough. I am half-assing it, which can be as effective as doing nothing at all. If I can show up sometimes, why can’t I do it all the time?
What’s the big ding dang deal, anyway? I had the website made and all the other little doo dads, so que es la problema? (Use your translator, you got this…).
The answer for me is always fear. Fear of being judged. Fear of sticking my neck out and failing. Fear of having to explain myself to people who don’t understand what it’s like to having these intuitive gifts. I can’t tell you how many times I have been asked to predict the winning lotto numbers. Ugh! I don’t “predict”, I give insight. It can be very deep insight that I am able to see and feel, and the person needing it cannot. I am not going to tell you what will happen to you. This is for you to decide.
The irony is, I have failed a million times and it didn’t kill me. I am a risk taker and always have been. In fact, I have given up uncomplicated, seemingly smooth situations so that I could hit the road less traveled. Why is the risk of letting it all out there so difficult? Why now?
Because I am aware of these fears now. I spent years with these fears and many others without even knowing it. I brought the fears out so I could tell them to bugger off!
Carl Jung wrote, “Until you make the unconscious conscious, it will direct your life and you will call it fate.” Let that sink in for a minute…
Fate is a double-edged sword. I have been cut by both sides. I have stood by and watched it happen and I have created my own fate. Both have value, but being in control of my fate takes away the “how did this happen?” Syndrome. I’m accountable. I’m empowered.
So, I got schooled today. I had to make a list of 20 things I am afraid of if I put myself out there. I also made a list of 20 benefits to staying exactly where I am right now, the “no growth, slow death” portion of the exercise. The other part of being schooled was I had to write about it. I really love whining and talking all about me, me, me! Sort of…
One of my wise grasshopper yogi’s asked me what I have to give up by continuing to write and promote my gifts to the world. I immediately answered with “Nothing.”
I have absolutely nothing to give up or lose by sharing my kick-butt gifts with you.
I have everything to gain because I created this for myself. Truth is, I would much rather hear YOUR story! I want to know what is holding you back and how fear has kept you from doing all the amazing things you want and deserve! Let’s meet! Let’s Kick that fear in the rear!